stupidity feels like this

god... i feel so stupid.
to think that, maybe.. there was some sort of spark. some sort of chemistry?

well, flirtation and suggestions don't mean nothing
when the person is too occupied to even talk to you
it doesn't mean squat
if the person doesn't peel his eyes away from whatever damn thing he is doing
and give you attention
especially when you are *upset* (vaguely)

... it really doesn't mean squat.
and again, it proves to me that words are not to be trusted. fun and sensational, they mislead and disappoint.

oh yeah they do. nothing like a cold shower to wake me up.

thanks, but no thanks.

now i just need to try to remember this... because, unfortunately for me, i was expecting something. and somehow i know, deep inside i am still. i just need it smacked between my eyes before i will let go?

but no. i will start. now.

good night.